Forgiveness

It was roughly 4 years ago. I was at home and I had began to experience symptoms of impending illness. I had chills and I was feeling weak. I would sometimes experience this in the past if a cold was coming on. I climbed up the stairs to go to my room. Upon reaching my bed, I sat down and began to pray. I knew why I was experiencing these symptoms and it was not because of a cold.

You see, about 3 years earlier, I had been deeply hurt by someone close to me. I thought I had forgiven and let go. I really thought I had. I think I began to cry. Why won't this pain stop ? Why won't it go away and stop haunting me ? Why can't I let go ? I was experiencing these symptoms of physical illness because of a heart condition that had not been completely dealt with : unforgiveness. So I began to pray. I cannot remember the exact words but I remember telling the Lord how much I desired to no longer live with an unforgiving heart. I remember praying to be set free from unforgiveness. I remember forgiving and releasing the person out loud. I asked God to forgive me for not forgiving.

Then it happened : almost as if dark clouds were parting with rays of sunshine coming through , the physical symptoms I had been experiencing earlier left.  Just like that ! Ever since that day, I have been convinced without a doubt that unforgiveness will make you sick not just spiritually but physically as well. If you continue in it, it will eventually kill you. Literally.

You see in my case, I thought I was justified to hold in such pain and resentment because after all I was the one who was hurt! I mean some sins are forgivable and others are not , right ? God's Word is clear when it comes to forgiveness. If I can't forgive others, God can't forgive me.

And forgive us our sins; for we also forgive every one that is indebted to us... - Luke 11:4

This is God's standard and no talk show host or popular opinion erases God's standard. If we call ourselves true believers in Jesus Christ, then it is imperative to forgive even the most egregious offenses.

The day I asked God to help me forgive and let go of the past, I was completely set free. Will you allow Him to do the same ?

SHALOM